Lessons from a Documentary
I couldn’t stop watching — only enough to sleep and finish it the next day. The clock went back one hour, and I needed that hour. But when I got up, I thought of him. ‘I love you, Gabriel,’ I whispered. It’s the mantra I repeated it over and over before I went to sleep, and I woke up saying it. I whispered it to heaven, hoping an angel would carry it to him. He didn’t hear it enough while he was alive, and I wanted to make up for it now.
No one should have to watch The Trials of Gabriel Fernandez on Netflix, but they should make themselves. Do what you have to do — breathe, cry, take a break, walk around the coffee table holding your head, shout in anger, but watch it.
In the docuseries, the judge said that even animals knew how to take care of their young, and he was right. We boast of our ability to reason, which gives us superiority over other mammals that walk in all four. Science tells us how our brains are different than theirs, and because of it, we don’t act on instinct. Instead, we reason to make decisions and can even perform complicated tasks.
If this is true, why did two humans kill an eight-year-old boy?
I too ignored Gabriel. Netflix picked the series for me, but I couldn’t make myself watch it two days ago. I had too much going on, I thought. I didn’t want to add more to my overloaded emotional tank. But last night I couldn’t put it off anymore. I knew it would devastate me to watch, but I made myself do it.
It was already 9 PM an hour after my bedtime, and my husband sneaked downstairs to find me. He placed his arm around my shoulder. “You know this is horrible?”
I wouldn’t take my eyes off the screen. They were dried and itchy, but I owe Gabriel (and all the other abused children) to watch. “Yes, but unlike them.” I pointed at the screen with my chin. “I won’t look away.”
My husband, with his own mental issues to deal, rubbed my shoulder. I think he placed a kiss on my cheek, but I couldn’t remember. “I’m going upstairs to take my meds.”
I nodded. I was okay with him leaving. A parent himself of two little ones whom he’s separated from, but wishes with all his might to have with him, this hit too close to home. It would be too much for him living with him. We all have our demons. But he came back and watched silently with me. I placed my head on his shoulder. I needed him, after all.
And we watched.
If we could reason, how did Pearl and Isauro conclude that inflicting pain and torturing Gabriel to his death was right?
Whatever happened to the Golden Rule? Treat others as you would like to be treated.
If the LA Department of Children and Family Services, cannot control the actions of the abuser, are they at least responsible for keeping the child safe?
When the Sheriff’s Department checked on the home, how come they didn’t ask to see the child? And when the mom told them, the child had moved to Texas, checked with DCSF?
A reasonable individual would think if these departments are in service of children, family, and the safety of its citizens, they will do anything within their power to carry on that mission even if that meant working and communicating with one another.
If the mom is the alleged abuser, why did the social workers and Sheriff deputies take her word at face value? Why not investigate further? Who writes a case off solely on the alleged perpetrator’s point of view?
The hairs on the back of my neck raised, when the grandparents said that Gabriel was put in the back seat of the Sheriff’s car and threatened for lying.
An eight-year-old kid, threatened by an adult, charged to protect him. Gabriel never had a chance, and I’m afraid he felt that way too. The sticky notes he wrote gave me that impression too. He knew he was going to die at the hands of his mother, yet loved her unconditionally. This child had more complex deductive reasoning than the adults in the house. He grew too quickly and made to feel emotions a child should never have.
Unfortunately, he’s not the only one then or now. What happened to Gabriel has happened again, and I’m afraid it will continue this way. The documentary talks of two other cases: Anthony and Noah. Something tells me, Gabriel, Anthony, and Noah are just the tip of the iceberg.
But what can we do?
Watch. Don’t turn away; watch the docuseries. Gabriel was ignored in real life, by many who excused it away, and believed the mother’s side of the story, while never putting their eyes on the child. They didn’t watch Gabriel.
Follow-Through. A common excuse I often hear is, “I told such and such to do this,” when something doesn’t get done. What is missing here is not the order, but the closing of the loop in that form of communication. It’s easy to be hands-off nowadays. Technology has made it so. We could send a quick email, or a text and never have to look that person in the eye if we chose to. But follow-through is vital when you expect things to get done.
The supervisors at DCSF Kevin Bom and Gregory Merritt didn’t check their social workers. Do you know why I believe this? Because the files were missing body charts, that if the supervisor were checking, he would have seen that. Gregory Merritt said in the docuseries that he felt he did everything within his power, but I beg to differ. He did not. He didn’t do his job well, and when the stakes are people’s lives, then you have an even bigger responsibility to be thorough. If he would have checked his files routinely, he would have noticed the mistake of the missing body chart and could have asked for an additional check on the child, which could have led to a medical examination. But he didn’t check the files, and the social workers didn’t put their eyes on Gabriel.
Accountability. There’s a trend happening now, and that is of agencies and entities feeling comfortable enough not to perform their duties correctly.
The anonymous testimony in the docuseries said something along the lines that in the dark, it’s easy to do things halfway or not at all without repercussions.
We must hold these agencies accountable. They have jobs and a paycheck because they are supposed to provide a service to the community. In essence, they are there for us — the citizens — and if they don’t do their jobs, then it is the citizen’s responsibility to demand they do and vote accordingly.
I was content when I found out some of the families were going forward with a civil suit, because if DCSF and LA County don’t wake up from the increased children’s body count, then maybe they will wake up from the decreased funds.
Although the California appellate court found the four social workers not liable for Gabriel Fernandez’s death, it’s hard to believe that DCSF dotted all their i’s and crossed their t’s.
I’m afraid when the time comes to dig deeper into these agencies that are supposed to care for vulnerable populations; we will find the real monsters in the story. They go by the names of Greed, Complacency, Negligence, and Apathy. I just hope that we do it soon, so there won’t be anymore Gabriels, Anthonys, or Noahs.
I love you Gabriel
I love you Anthony
I love you Noah
If you feel called to do so, please follow the link to sign the petition.
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